Speak up!

Hello friends.

It is no more a secret we all know my interest for self-excellence, force, and braveness just by reading my posts each from the first to now. I am not a passive person of at least I try not to be. I think this world has become a real huge jungle and we are not here to be passive but to strengthen enough our self to rise over every situation, every person, every feeling that tries to hold us down. It must start with a voice.

A closed mouth cannot be feed, said an actress I really love.She is right.Ifwe want to be heard, we must speak and speak so loud to be understood. We must speak promptly and wisely to be acknowledge. If you stand up for something whatever it is, the best way to catch the ears and minds is to raise your voice. If you are afraid to speak try a pen 😆 it is good too, watch me. If someone offends, you say it. If you want something, ask for it. Do whatever you can, but do not stay silent.

Now this is the process friends:

1- Know what you say and care of how you say it. Don’t get involved in things of subjects you know nothing about, in which there is no interests and in which you or your work are not related in any way, otherwise you may just pull some bullshits out. 

2- wait for the best time to speak. Stop speaking uselessly. If I learnt something from Buddhist believers, it is the importance to shut the mouth off when nothing good, wise and useful, intelligently said is going to be express.

3- be true with yourself and with others. What you say will be consider by your audience as what you think. What you stand up for will be consider as your own fight. Your image, your reputation, your relations will be either good or bad just relating to what you have said.

"You get in life what you have the courage to ask for" Oprah Winfrey.

LOVE!!

Be responsible !

Hello friends.

Firstly, let me wish you a sunny and happy sunday. Secondly, let us talk about the responsability of our own lives.

I failed this because someone did this or did not. I did not succeed in this because of this circumstance, because of this person. And so on and so on… and what about you? What have you done? which opportunity have you ever take? We often fail to take responsibility for our life, accusing the fate, the gods, friends and family, poverty of time to deny our own responsibility for our life and future.

I know sometimes it might be difficult, it might be tough and we need to be more than willingly to breakthrough. But even though we may end up saying we have done all it was possible for us to do, give what ever it had cost. This is how we are going to act by now: 

1- Make yours your disappointments and disillusions. I do not have friends because people are fake, I failed this exam because the teacher is a fool, I made mistake because I was not well advised, and others things we used to tell ourselves to put onto others the responsibility of our disappointments instead of put it onto our self. Stop hiding from reality and get some nerves. Ours disappointments are the simple results of our choices. We might have take unappropriate decisions, or we might not give all and every card and best shot we had to it. Or simply, what we wanted was not for us. 

2- Go through every engagement even if it seems not to be as clear as you wish. To live means to celebrate life, give love and receive it as it comes to you, dwell with others in harmony while being responsible for our acts. If you think you are not ready for something, be courageous and honest enough to recognise it and walk away. No one will blame you because you acknowledge your limits or your unskillness, but they will blame you if you fail to go through your engagements. 

3-Take and consider any advice that comes up to you. We may think you already know what to do in each way but sometimes we failed because of our pride and selfishness. We must accept the fact that one may have a better idea. I’m not saying you must do what others want you to do but you must first listen and consider then what to take and what you should not by balancing it with what you want. Wait, listen, watch and then act. 

‘’The price of greatness is the responsibility."-Winston Churchill-

LOVE!!

Sois altruiste !

Salut les amis!

Pour une fois je dois avouer que je ne sais pas. Je ne sais pas si à long terme les idées que je vais émettre dans ce post pourront porter leurs fruits. Mais je sais qu'à court terme, je remarque des améliorations. Quand je confronte ces approches à la réalité, à la vie quotidienne, le résultat est positif. De quoi je parle?😄

Je parle aujourd'hui de relations saines. Relations sociales toutes confondues ( entre frères, entre collègues, entre amis, entre voisins, avec ses parents, entre conjoints ou tout simplement entre compagnons). Tous les jours dans nos relations, nous dressons des attentes, nous faisons part de nos exigences, nous nourrissons des intérêts. Nous le faisons de façon si habituelle que cela en devient presque standard. Nous cherchons à combler des besoins et punissons qui que ce soit qui, nous côtoyant, ne réussirait pas à combler ces besoins.

Je pense qu'agir ainsi est un poison pour les relations, la fin des échanges sincères. On nous répète un peu partout que dans la vie il faut avoir des attentes, et c'est aux autres de les remplir; qu'il faut avoir des exigences, et c'est à l'autre de les satisfaire; qu'il faut surtout avoir un intérêt, et c'est l'autre qui le subira. Que faisons-nous donc de gratuit? 

La vie est gratuite, l'amour l'est également. Vivre de façon capitaliste, manipulateurs qui s'ignorent ou s'acceptent, fait de nous des égoïstes, des profiteurs. Alors je pense que commencer à vivre en se considérant sur un même pied d'égalité pourrait faire de nous des personnes altruistes. Voici quelques idées, qui à mon expérience, font réellement la différence.

1. Etre tolérant envers les autres. Leurs fautes, leurs imperfections, leurs manquements ne sont pas toujours dirigés vers nous alors ne les prenons pas personnellement. 

2. Donner toujours de sa personne en premier aux autres au lieu d'en attendre d'eux. Tout ce dont nous avons besoin nous sommes à mesure de nous le procurer sans faire du tort aux autres.

3. Découvrez, apprenez, appréciez, partagez!

"le bonheur est né de l'altruisme et le malheur de l'égoïsme" Bouddha

Ça fait toute la différence.

LOVE!!

  

Make perfect choices ! (part 2)

Hello friends!

If you have read the first part of this topic, then it means you are aware enough about making perfect choices. If you have not read it, I actually think it could be appropriate to do it, so you can have a feedback and follow.

Some of you, and I am sure it will be men, may probably found that the former example I took with the necklace was just sized to girls😃. I am so sorry for that I just took the first thing that came onto my mind. You can just replace the necklace with whatever you want.

I have illustrated to you the meaning of a perfect choice. Now let me tell you why it is actually important to make choice with the purpose of perfection. Although perfection does not exist, we can still make some perfect choices. The perfection I mean, does not apply to human being but to actions. We, as humans cannot be perfect but our actions actually can be perfect. A perfect action will not harm you. It will not have onto you regretful consequences. It will not create inside of you feelings that will vanish with time. They are clearly mindfully and realistic choices. 

This is how you can experience the process of making perfect choices:

1. Evaluate what is most important to you. It will help you to take the best actions to achieve whatever you want. Take actions in accordance with the most important thing to you and relay the others for later if they come up to be most important. 

2. Focus on your highest priorities. You will clearly identify which actions you must take regardless of circumstances. By the time you listed the most important things, classify them by priority. Don't pay attention to what seems to be good because somtimes it is not. Just prioritize.

3. Take your time, it is one step at a time. Don't go into a rush, it will not serve your best interests.

"You will have to accept that you are powerless over everything other than yourself. you only have control over your own choices and purpose." Rosalene Glickman.

Hope you will enjoy this topic and found it helpful. Share and leave comments.

LOVE!!

Make perfect choices ! (part 1)

Hello friends.

Last year, my purpose was to share with you about motivation, happiness and positivity. I think I have quite done with it. Therefore, I hope you gained something, somehow, as for me I gained achievement. This year I will be sharing with you on excellency.

I am sure you want to ask me: what is a perfect choice? how do I recognize a perfect choice? what is  the meaning of perfect choice?

A perfect choice is a choice that is made in consideration of external elements and intrinsic values.  Obtaining the good balance with what you want and what you need. 

As for me, I think it is really difficult to make good choices because what you think to be good to you, can definitely appear not to be. Sometimes, we think we are taking the good decision but later regret it. The bad choice is the one that will cause you injury somehow because based on momental, ponctual feeling. And once the feeling has gone, you then realize the mistake. The difficulty lying in the concept of good choice and bad choice is that there is no instruction, no proccess, no element to guide you. 

On the other hand, we can all make perfect choices. Let me take an example: I walk in a mall and I see this necklace, so beautiful I really want to buy it. It cost 250 and I have 400 in my pocket. It is wednesday and I that is all the money I have for the rest of the week. I then focus on the necklace. 

• The good choice will be the one based on reason: I don't have enough money in my pocket. If I buy this overpriced necklace I will brooke my pin. I choose not to buy it. 

• The bad choice will be based on my feelings: This necklace is incredibly beautifull. Although it is overpriced, I will still buy it because I'm kinda sexy with it. I choose to buy it and I have less money for the week.

• The perfect choice will be the one based on equity. Equity will help you obtaining what you need by balancing your feelings with your reason: The necklace is overpriced and I don't have a neclace in my wardrobe so I need a necklace and I choose this one. I will earn some money along the month I will buy my necklace without causing a loss to my pocket. One month later I have a necklace and my pocket has suffer no loss.

I really think this is the easiest way to be the excellent person we deserve to be. You may think this proccess of making choices is long. You are right. But it is wealthier, it is fair, it will preserve you and it can be applied to every situation in our lives. 

Don't be in a hurry, don't be afraid, I will show you how I  have learned to make the perfect choices in my life. Watch out for the end soon.

"Everyday brings new choices" Martha Beck.

LOVE!!

Don't compare yourself !

Hello friends. 

It's been a long time. I gulped myself in work, study and so many others stuffs that I totally drove out of the blog. But underneath all that preassure, I was restless, always looking for the next topic because I kept in mind my purpose. 

Today, I want to share with you my thoughts about comparizing ourselves, our life to others life. Let me tell what happened to me few weeks ago. I moved to another home. I really like my new place it is calm and cosy. Once, I was walking to my appartment and my neighbor's door was between-opened and I have few seconds look to her home. Instantly, something passed through my mind and I thought her home was more beautiful than mine. But two days after, she invited me to talk and that day I got my revelation. Indeed her home was beautifully decorated but it was smaller than mine, less luminous than mine. From that day I realized my home was perfect for me. It doesn't have enough space but it has everything I need a home and I can hear the birds singing in the morning when I wake up. That day I laughed at myself. It was a stupid thought but it helped me understand that I have not to compare to others. I learned from it and I want you too to learn from this mistake I did. 

Even though you are facing struggles, misunderstood, trials and battles, difficulties, don't compare yourself with others. Don't get involved in it because nothing good ain't never coming out of that. 

Friends, here are three majors reasons we should all start to trust our life and stop comparizing with others life. 

1. It is unproductive. Comparing changes nothing! Instead of waisting time doing comparison with what you have or not to what others have, we should start to accept what we have just as it is. We must find the better way to appreciate what we have. There is always something doing that what you have is particular. In my story above, my home and my neighbor's are the same in terms of space distribution. Each of us have decorated her home as like. But I found a way to love what I have. I enjoy everyday the birds singing and I make it perfect to me.

2. It drives you to jealousy and you will be waisting time. It is not an obligation for us to have the prettiest. What we need is to feel good, happy. Comparing will make you feel like you don't have everything, you don't have enough, but it will never show you what you have. 

3. It demeanishes your own value. You are seeing your life in someone else's mirror and nothing good ain't going to come out of it, trust me. It may seems beautiful to you but it ain't, just because it is not your life, it is not you, and you are demeanishing your value. You are worth, we are all worth, and we have what it takes to become everything we want. What you see now, what you face now, may be painful for you, but you don't have to be sorry of it. Nobody ever says it is going to be pink and nice. Take and own every situation. It is yours.

"Comparing yourself to others is an act of violence against your authentic self" Iyanla Vanzant.

I hope you liked it. Leave me some comments below.

LOVE!!

Attract what you expect!

Hello friends.

I hope your week has been full of grace and surprises. If not, keep in mind that life is a long road to hit. Every day may not be as well as you would have wish. You will find out the beautiful where your hope for something better lies.

Now, let me tell you something I have come to believe that it is the real truth. You can have exactly what you want. That man, that girl, you can have exactly the one that fits you. Careful! I am not saying you will the perfect one. NO! I say you can have the one that fits you. And it is all up to you. You may be asking yourself how you can have it all. It is simple. Attract what you expect!

We have been created to have the good, the beautiful and the marvellous. Now we have to go and get it.

Friends, these are 3 ways to start attracting what you expect and put yourself at the right place.

1.       Be what you deserve. First of all, you have to know what you deserve, know your worth and trust me; there is no other better way to start. If you need, make a list. Don’t be ashamed because it is all about you and no one else. You are fighting for your best. Don’t mind no one’s argument. It is none of their business. When you finally know what you deserve, start being it. Example: if you want a generous person, start to be generous with others. If you want a kind person, be kind with everyone. If you want a God fear person, start building your own spiritual relationship with God. if you want a go-ahead person, dynamic, be dynamic too. Good comes to good, bad comes to bad. If you are good, you are able to recognise bad and say NO. It is not a match, it is reciprocity.

2.       Don’t beg for it, don’t chase it, let it come to you. Let me tell you something. We are winners not losers. We are built to fight and win not to fail. You don’t have to be desperate. Society wants us to be ashamed and frustrated when we do not get in the social frame. When we do things differently, when we think like the smartest people we really are.  But guess I don’t care and I would not and never care. This has to be your refrain. Say: “I don’t care. My life is too worth it to be assimilated”. You don’t have to beg for attention, for love, for respect, for kindness. Give it to yourself. You owe it to you first. Then, let people give it to you. If they don’t, let them take the road.

3.       Never compromise with yourself. I worked in an office about one year ago as intern. My boss was such a wise and God fear woman. When I came to the end of my internship, she lovely told me: “Daughter, do not compromise with yourself. Never!” I never forgot it. Compromising with yourself simply means not doing what you want to do just because that's not what someone else/society/system wants. Don't let your best friend down. Your best friend is YOU. 

“I can accept anything, except what seems to be the easiest for most people: the half-way, the almost, the just-about, the in-between.” Ayn Rand

If you liked the post, please share and comment.

LOVE!!

stay focused!

 

Hello friends!

A new week starts with new challenges and we have to keep going forward with strenght and braveness. That means we have to run away from distractions if we want to get all things done at the end of the week. 

There is no doubt, focus is becoming a crucial skill in everything you planed to do, or you are doing. 

So friends, these are 3 reasons to stay focused this week. Let's go!

1. Distractions low your productivity. Yes, distraction reduces your productivity and everything you will be doing will not have the higher result you expected from it. Just one distraction can stop you from working. But I know how hard it can be to try to escape from them. Social media, TV, texting, food, games, phone calls, pets, and even the mirror infront of you. Everything that catches your attention just for a single minute can considerably reduce your progression.

2. One minute wasted is one minute cut off on your worktime. There is just 24 hours in a day and about 15 hours for work. Do you really think it is too much? If you have a full list of work for a day you will end up realizing that 15 hours is not enough. So don't wast your precious time. You do not have to manage time. That is not possible because time flies. You have to manage yourself.

3. Focus leads to consistency. Hey! In the last post, I invited you to be consistent persons. Just check the post and you will know more about it. Click here! 

"Nothing moves unless you are determined to push" Nicky Verd.

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LOVE!!

Be consistent !

Hello friends.

I hope everyone's ok. We are launching the end of the week so I guess we are all in the right mood😁. Why I want all of us to be consistent, more and more? I have realize that people around me always almost fail when they try to improve their lives, or to make their lives something better. It has been easier for me to realize it because a few years ago I was doing the same. 

What is consistency?  Consistency is conformity, in doing something. It is an evoluative process that needs to be build everyday. Let me give you and example. You want to eat more healthy. But you are still eating at fast food and drink sodas more than twice a week😳. It won't works. To be consistent in that goal, you have to start cooking healthy food at home. I hope we are all understanding the meaning. 

Nowourday, it has become usual for us to want immediate results and instant gratification that we have come to believe our personal transformation should happen instantaneously, the minute we decide we want it to happen. But almost all the time, the result we are looking for will not come quickly. 

So, I am going to share with you 3 tips, I have experienced and which are still working for me, with you to help you  to be consistent. 

1. Give yourself time to increase. The truth is lasting change doesn’t happen quickly. But if you let the magic of compounding efforts do their thing, over time you can have some truly amazing results in any area of your life. This requires patience;

2. Empower your will. Consistency requires willpower to achieve. Example: somedays you do not want to go to work, or you do not want to be kind but you do it because you empower your will. It is not just about your feelings, it is about being consistent. When you master your will, it makes all the difference. If you do not know your to master your will, just take a look at this past post about it. Check it 😊 ;

3. Be resistent and set boundaries.  Setting a boundary really just means setting constraints on exactly how and when you're going to do certain things. with boundaries it will be easier to be consistent. You know exactly what you have to do. acting. Example: you do not just have to say " ok by now I will be consistent!" NO. It does not work like this. You must start acting. If you want to be a kindly person, don't say "I am kind by now" but start greeting people you meet, appreciate them, appreciate their work, when they do good stuff let them know and this has to be usual, so that you can be consistent. 

“In essence, if we want to direct our lives, we must take control of our consistent actions. It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.”

Anthony Robbins

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Stop living in the past !

Hello friends.

We are not define by our past. By now we must choose if we want to be able to learn from our mistakes and grow stronger and wiser or allow those experiences make us fearful and limited. We tend to let the negatives past apsects of our life surviving in our minds. We keep replaying them over and over. Stop replaying the emotional drama if it leads to a constant negative internal conclusion. Change the way you look at it. Learn to react and respond differently. Challenge yourself to see it as a positive.

Let us try to move forward with these solutions:

1. Forgive yourself for all mistakes. If you are harboring resentment towards another human being because of past hurts, choose to forgive and move on. And just as it, forgive yourself for every missed opportunity, every hurt, every mistake, every betrayal. The harm was their fault or maybe yours, but allowing it not to impact your mood today is your responsability.

2. Take new resolutions for the future. You can't change the past or worry about the future, so don't dwell on it. Think about happy things happening right now. One good thing is to try blocking or pushing aside your memories. This can help you get over bad memories with enough time. 

3. Appreciate the moment and be aware of your thoughts and emotions. The only important moment is the present moment. Eliminating nonessential possessions will free us from emotions that were keeping us stuck in the past. Allow right now freedom to shape your life arround your values. You are in control of your attitude every morning. So keep yourself smiling.

"Hanging on to resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head.” Ann Landers.

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LOVE!!

Celebrate achievements !

Hello friends.

Friday is a particular day for me. I really like it and it is not just because it introduces the week-end, but more because it is time for the retrospective of the week. It is the day for me to sit and review all those things I noted on my agenda as tasks for every day. The things I have done, and also the things I have not done. What I do this day, is celebration. Yes! It may seems curious but yes I celebrate. I celebrate at the end of the day, all my achievements along the week, from the smallest to the biggest. I am sure you want to know how I celebrate my achievements. I do something for myself that will me feel very happy cause I am proud of what I’ve done. So, Friday night I offer myself a glass of red wine 😍 hummm I really like it, or a big cup of ice cream 😋. Those are the two little things I really like. I don't do this every day because you know I really care of my health.

So today, my purpose, by tell you how I spend my Friday, is to help you realise that you should celebrate every single achievement.  We are so tough with ourselves, so unkind sometimes and I know it just by looking around me how people are so frustrated. Comforting ourselves in this behaviour is killing our happiness, the part of joy in us that helps us to see the world in a beautiful way. 

I really want us to get out of that attitude we have sometimes to ignore what we are doing. If someone does not tell you “hey, good job dude!” or “ girl, you got it”, you have the obligation to tell it to yourself. Tell yourself you are good, tell yourself you did it well.

So, this is how we are going to overcome.

1.       Pay attention on what you do along the day. The best way I think to help you know what you have been doing along the day at the end, is to hand a note book. For me, I used to work with notes, that I draw at night the day before or earlier in the morning when I wake up. By doing this, we can easily pay attention on what we are doing and at the end of the day or the end of the week, we can have a review of our achievements;

2.       There is no little victory. Every little single accomplishment is a victory. Keep in mind that you are doing things for you not for the greatness of someone else. So if you do wrong, you are doing it to you;

3.       Reward yourself for the accomplishment and forgive yourself for what you have not done. It is the key of inner peace. Reward for the good, forgive for the unsuccesful. we all worth it. Choose the celebration that fits you and make sure you keep your happiness.

Hope this post will inspire more than one. I don’t know what you have planned for the week but I am going to read more and edified you next week. I wish you a nice week-end.

Please share and comment if you liked.

LOVE !!